imagined light
the sun chased me through the bus window today as i replayed topshe's "imagined light" for the nth time, and when the sun was chasing me i got reminded of the time when i used to sit in the backseat of my parents’ car as they drove us places, facing the back window, looking at the moon, thinking, the moon is following me, at times i would lose sight of the moon but a quick glance around and surely enough i would find her peeking at me in whatever shape/form/avatar she chose to adorn that day, she would paint the sky near her a beautiful silver. her limited light would fall on trees outlining their shape but leaving the details of the leaves undetectable,
the sun that chased me today was playing peekaboo with the line of trees, it would coyly hide behind and then appear in all her glory with its yellow orange and pink hues,
the foliage filtering the light as it reached me and the sun? imparting color to the entirety of the sky and the world, the sun was also making space for her lover, the moon to be with her, i guess they both know that their romance is fleeting, very little space and time for them to co-exist, the sun shines so brightly and powerfully that she has to consume the sky to make her presence known, the moon is always making space for her lover and is happy basking in her light.
they meet briefly and say goodbye to each other as the twilight ends and the sun goes down the clouds, down the horizon, down down and further down, perhaps chasing her lover. the sun also loses her firm circular shape, diminishing as she makes space for the moon.
and her lover? she ascends the skies, she likes playing with younger kids all the while assuring them that she's there, in every direction, in every road they traverse and when the sun is not here, she will show up, maybe not wholly, maybe not fully, but she will come and maybe the sun knows that, the limitations of her lover and she shines brighter for the both of them.
and i like to think of the moon as my constant companion even all these years later, and when the days are a bit difficult and life feels daunting i think, when was the last time i looked up at the moon?
it doesn’t solve anything obviously, but it's always good to decenter from the magnanimity of all my problems and put things a bit into perspective.
love,
j